Are You Trying to Control Your Weight to Control Your Life?

IMG_20190910_080149_994.jpg

Like it or not, we cannot control our lives or the people in our lives. Many of us have likely heard this repeatedly, but knowing this on an intellectual level and living it are very different, right?

One of the aspects of our lives that many attempt to control when life feels out of control is to try to control their bodies (their shape), weight, food intake (by restricting or overeating), and by over/under exercising. While this is very common among a large majority of the population (Thank you diet culture!) it's even more commonly seen in women who struggle in their relationships with food and body.

This is understandable since on some level many still believe they can control their weight. In fact, they insist on it so they continue to diet, restrict, eat "clean", compulsively exercise, or do detoxes and/or cleanses, etc. And you know what, they may have some success with that if they try hard enough but even then, it's likely not sustainable long-term.

No matter how hard we try, at some point we need to accept that our bodies are not meant to remain the same throughout our lives. I know, it's not an easy pill to swallow! I get it. At 53, I've been through all the menopausal phases and I've seen and felt how my body has changed. I've also experienced fears around aging that I never could have imagined possible until now.

How are you managing these kinds of changes and fears in your life? Are you white knuckling these life phases by trying to control your food in hopes of maintaining your weight (which you believe directly corresponds to your health)? If you are, know that you're not alone!

I want to share a secret with you...

The more we try to control our food and weight, the more likely we are to experience binges, overeating, emotional/stress eating, anxiety, and body dissatisfaction.

On the flip side, the more we allow ourselves to eat nourishing (and enjoy "play" foods too) foods that make us feel good most of the time, move our bodies in ways that help us to feel energized and increase our stamina and strength, learn to appreciate and respect our bodies as they are, the more freedom and satisfaction we're likely going to experience in our lives. And, as an added bonus, following this advice will also very likely improve or maintain metabolic health too!

So the next time you find yourself white knuckling your way through a meal because there are too many ________ in it or restricting food with the insidious goal of losing weight, think of how that may be affecting your relationship with food, body, your health (metabolic, physical, emotional and spiritual) and your overall happiness.

Some questions to ponder if you're feelings resistance or fear about this message,

  • What could you be missing out on by attempting to control your eating and weight?

  • How could these behaviors be affecting your relationships?

  • What else could you be using that emotional energy for instead?

I'd love to hear from you! Feel free to reply to this love note, join my No-Diet Sisterhood group, or drop me a message on Instagram.


If you're tired of battling with your weight, fed up with the cycle of yo-yo dieting, and yearning to be free from your obsessive thinking about food and your body, schedule your complimentary Embrace Anti-Diet Living Connection Session.

We’ll get clear on where you are now, what you want instead, and what might be getting in the way of your success.

I’ll also share some powerful recommendations and resources to get you started on creating a peaceful relationship with your body and food.